Ladies, listen up. Donโt let your search for Mr. Right end up involving search warrants or a search for a missing person. You need to be extra careful in accepting dates. Most importantly, you need to know what it takes to prevent sexual assault on Valentineโs Day. This goes for guys, too. You can also be victims of sexual assault. The sexual violence prevention tips weโre going to share here will hopefully help you not only on V-Day or Single Awareness Day but on any other day for that matter.
Valentineโs Day is fun for couples and families even. However, beneath the faรงade of this popular holiday that has been marketed for decades is something sinister. All genders have fallen victim to sexual assaults on Valentineโs Day.
Sexual violence on Valentineโs Day is not mainly done by strangers or dates. It can happen to couples, as well. According to the National Resource Center on Domestic Violence, there is a decrease in cases of domestic abuse on Valentineโs Day. But donโt tell that to the victims themselves. Being maltreated any day of the year is bad. Being abused on a day thatโs supposedly filled with love is even worse. This is another good reason why people should know what it takes to prevent sexual violence.
Choose Your Date Carefully
It may seem like something out of a romantic film for someone to suddenly approach you because they were supposedly smitten by you. Who wouldnโt like that sensation of being told you caught their eye and their heart? But as much as you donโt want another missed connection, you need to be wise and careful.
Donโt just say yes to anyone who asks you out, especially if you donโt know the person. The same goes with people you know. If you donโt want to go on a date with that person, donโt. You are not obliged to go out with anyone even if said person is nice to you. Even if your love life is on life support, you should still be wary of the people asking you on a date.
Trust No One
I know this sounds like a line from a thriller movie but, these days, itโs really hard to trust anyone. Remember, most sexual assaults are perpetuated by someone known to the victim. So even if youโre going out on a date with a friend or acquaintance, make sure to still look after yourself and keep your guards up.
Go On A Double Date or Group Date
One way to know a person is to see how he behaves with other people. Aside from seeing how he treats servers or bartenders, you should get a good feel with how your date is with your friends. Plus, your friends can also chime in and help you decide if he deserves a second date or not.
Most importantly, a double date or group date is a lot safer than going out alone with a stranger. If your date is actually thinking of something malicious, the presence of other people will foil his plan.
Ask Someone To Keep An Eye On You
If you prefer not to double date or go with a group of friends, you can at least ask a close friend or relative to hang out at the place where you will be. Theyโre not there to spy on your guy, of course. Theyโre just a safety net in case your date doesnโt pan out or if you need rescuing.
Go To A Public Place Youโre Familiar With
If youโre going on a first date with someone you rarely know, make sure you get to choose where to go. Donโt go somewhere private where itโs just the two of you. Choose a public place so that other people are around you.
Also, choose a place youโre familiar with. You should know the ins and outs of the place in case you have to escape. If youโre a regular at the place, the people who work there should know you. That will make it easier for you to ask for help in case you need it.
Donโt be too confident, though. You may know the place like the back of your hand but you should still be extra observant. Check the exits in case there are obstacles that werenโt there before. Be wary of other people, too. Your potential sexual predator may not be your date but someone else who has the eyes on you.ย Develop your situational awareness to see any trouble before it happens.
Donโt Leave Your Drink Unattended
Never ever leave your drink or food unattended. Someone may slip some type of date rape drug while youโre not looking. This is common in many cases of date rapes.
Take a good look at your drink after itโs served. Remember what it looks like. If you notice during the course of the date that your drink has changed color, became cloudy, or has more bubbles than before, donโt take a sip anymore.
In case you didnโt notice the indicators above, a different or funny taste should indicate that it has been spiked. Stop drinking it immediately. Excuse yourself and call someone immediately to pick you up. It may be dangerous to go home on your own as the effects of the drug may take full effect while youโre trying to get home. This will leave you incapable of defending yourself if someone chances upon your groggy or unconscious self.
The said scenario makes it even more important to have a friend come with you on your date. Just make sure your friend keeps his or her guard up, too. Your friend also needs to know what to watch out for in case you have been drugged. Some important signs include loss of balance, drowsiness, slurred speech, and sudden poor vision.
Donโt Give Up Too Much Information
So youโre date seems to be going well and he keeps asking you about, well, you. That should be fine until he asks where you live, who lives with you, or if youโre alone at home. If you have no intentions of asking him if he wants to come inside for coffee, donโt divulge too much.
Leave If You Want To
If youโre starting to get uncomfortable, that should be a clear sign to end the date. Donโt be embarrassed or feel pity for the guy. If itโs not working, itโs not working. If heโs getting a tad too creepy, thatโs definitely a red flag.
Be wary of signs that he may get violent if you end the date or reject him, though. Call someone to fetch you. Make up some excuse why you have to cut the date short. Again, it pays to have a friend follow you and make sure youโre safe while scrutinizing your date if heโs the one or not.
Know Karate
When you are being threatened, the first thing on your mind should be to get away as far as possible. If the perpetrator has you pinned or cornered, you must apply what you learned in self-defense class. You should also consider taking martial arts training to increase your chances of preventing sexual assault.
Again, fighting shouldnโt be your first option. Itโs best to run away and seek help but if that is no longer an option, you should be capable of defending yourself with your bare hands. Oh ad since running is your best option, you should exercise regularly so your body is fit enough to escape any trouble.
If you havenโt had any training yet, you should at least know where to hit some to inflict the most damage. The body parts that will hurt most are the eyes, nose, ears and groin. Other places that can temporarily immobilize your attacker are the throat, chin, and knees. Use your head, elbows and knees. These are the hardest parts of your body. A solid punch may also hurt your hand. Use your hand more for grabbing and fingers and nails for scratching and poking the eyes.
Bring Protection
No, no, not that kind of protection. But, yeah, you should also bring one in case your date does go well and you end up doing consensual sex. But thatโs not the point here.
Whether youโre on a date or not, you should always carry some sort of weapon to defend yourself and prevent sexual assault. These non-lethal weapons combined with self-defense tactics and martial arts training should increase your chances of surviving an attack.
If you own or want to own a small firearm, you should get the necessary permits so you can carry it wherever you go. But a permit-to-carry is not enough. You should be in the right frame of mind before you can even purchase any firearm. Know the responsibilities that come with being a gun owner.
You should also know how to use your gun. In some cases, brandishing your firearm is not enough to scare away a potential assailant. If you need to fire your gun, you should know how to properly do so. This will help immobilize or neutralize the threat without harming innocent people.
Some less lethal weapons you can carry are a pocket knife and multi-tool with blade. Check with your local laws if your knife is allowed to be carried in public. Non-lethal weapons that should help prevent sexual assault and other crimes against you include pepper sprays, stun guns, and brass knuckles.
Telescopic police batons, Kubotan keychains, tactical flashlights and tactical pens can be used for self-defense, as well. You also need proper training so you can use these items effectively.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T2DLe624TYk&ab_channel=DonaldA.Wilson
Those weโve already mentioned are more for fighting. Whistles and personal alarms are more for scaring the assailant and getting the attention of other people who might help you. A car escape tool with a glass breaker and seatbelt cutter should come in handy in case youโre in the car with a sexual predator pretending to be your future Mr. Right.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OUQTNwhxDR4&ab_channel=GQPrepper
No Means No
This sexual violence prevention tip goes out to everyone regardless of gender — DONโT RAPE. Itโs that simple. Potential victims need to know they can say no. Potential rapists need to know they should never ever rape.
Agreeing to go out is not an invitation for sex. Dressing up in a sexy outfit doesnโt mean you can assault her. Getting a little drunk is not your dateโs way of saying you can do as you wish with him or her. The best way to prevent sexual assault on Valentineโs Day is for everyone to understand that it is not okay to have your way with another person without his or her consent.
If you are a victim of sexual violence, please donโt blame yourself. Itโs never the victimโs fault. Talk to someone about what you are going through. It might help relieve some of the bad memories and emotions youโve been keeping to yourself all this time. It might help you move on if you havenโt yet. Also, sharing your story may save someone else from falling victim to these sexual predators. You may help prevent sexual assault on Valentineโs Day and each other day of the year.
We take safety against all forms of danger seriously here at Gentleman Pirate Club. Thatโs why we do what we do. Hopefully, what we share on this page can help prevent someone from any kind of harm.